Beneath Your Beauty Page 11

  I must have convinced them that the conversation had not bothered me as they happily had gone on to tell me in detail about the threesome they had. They started talking candidly between each other, reminiscing about that night, with smiles on their Botox-induced faces while fanning themselves. When Cora had begun to tell her favorite part, I felt immense discomfort coursing through my body.

  “Ah, that was good, too,” Cora had said to Addie. She had blown my fucking mind as she went on, “But my favorite was when I was riding Steele’s face, facing you, and you were riding his incredible cock, sucking on my tits at the same time.”

  The bile had risen in my throat, threatening to spew from my mouth. “Where’s the ladies’ room?” I had asked.

  “Down that hall.” Addie had pointed behind me. “It’ll be to your right.”

  I carefully rose from the chair, my stomach twisting and turning. I had walked on unsteady legs to the restroom. My heart had been pounding so hard that I could feel it in my ears. Once inside, I checked to see if I was alone, and thank the Lord, I had been. I had just made it into the stall when I proceeded to vomit the stupid Cobb salad—that Cora had ordered for all of us because we apparently needed to watch our figures—into the white porcelain toilet as tears had streamed down my face.

  Kayden

  “What am I doing here?” I questioned the white ceiling. “Why white?” I didn’t only ask the ceiling, I also asked the walls while my head twisted from side to side on the pillow.

  When I had returned from the restroom, the pasties had told me that I looked like shit. That had made me feel shittier because I hadn’t thought I looked all that bad for just spewing my guts up in the mall restroom. Apparently, I had in their eyes. Then again, I shouldn’t have been surprised. This was the pasties—Cora with her platinum-blonde hair and blue eyes and Addie with her fake blue eyes and both in their size zero dresses with fake boobs. Furthermore, they’d had sex with Steele and had threesomes a lot.

  I’d claimed I wasn’t feeling well and blamed it on jet lag. They had told me I should cleanse my system, claiming I would feel a great deal better. I opted out on that. On the way out, I’d swung into a vitamin shop and bought some ginger pills, my save-all when I was nauseous.

  When I had texted Steele, he said he wasn’t going to be home, and neither would Rocco. He told me where they hid a key and to make myself at home. Therefore, I’d just about hopped out of Cora’s moving car. I went inside, downed two ginger pills with a glass of water, and headed for the shower.

  Following a long, hot shower, I had slathered myself up in my pumpkin lotion, scrunched my towel-dried hair with some mousse, and started prepping for the party tonight. I threw on pink cotton shorts and a white cami, and then I flopped on the bed.

  I sat up in bed and looked around. My head cocked to the side as my curiosity got the best of me. Opening the closet door, I glanced behind me, making sure no one was watching me even though I knew I was the only one here. I had snooped before, but that was the mother snoop where I quickly looked around my children’s rooms for anything that might look suspicious. Other than that, I’d never snooped on anyone. Maybe that had been my problem with Mary. Maybe I should have meddled around her room. Then, I wouldn’t have to be prying around my porn star boyfriend’s bedroom.

  God- that so doesn’t sound right.

  The closet was neat, like everything else in the house. Pants lined one side, shirts were on the other, shoes lay underneath the clothes, and some random boxes sat on top of the shelf. Some boxes had the Burn logo on them, and I bypassed those. What caught my eye was a blue bin. It was about two feet long and two feet deep.

  I jogged out into the bedroom, snatched my suitcase, and then went back in the closet. I stood on it and grabbed the bin.

  “Shit, you’re heavy,” I told the bin.

  It didn’t reply. Once I set it on the floor, I watched it. I didn’t know what would come out of it just by staring at it, but I did it anyway. A rush of nervous heat flushed my face.

  “What are you doing?” I asked myself. I knew the answer before I’d even asked the question.

  I needed to find out who Steele Kincaid was. And more about Steele Waters too.

  I pointed to the box. “Don’t move.”

  It listened, and I took off for the living room. Looking out the front window, I saw nothing but a quiet neighborhood, so I went back to the bedroom.

  Once back in the closet, I knelt down in front of the box. I unsnapped one handle. “Please, God, forgive me,” I prayed, and unlatched the other handle and pulled the lid off. My hands flew to my mouth as I inhaled a deep gasping breath.

  The box full of DVDs, all porn movies, stared back at me. They were all neatly packed and sadly in alphabetical order. I ran my fingers over the edges and pulled out Only Once. Steele’s beautiful blue eyes gazed back at me as I held up the box. He had that cocky grin on his face that I loved so much. A girl was kneeling between his legs, and his dick was in her mouth. I dropped the box as an unsettling stomach flip made my hands fly up to my mouth. The bitterness in the back of my throat wanted to spew all over the movies. I swallowed hard, took a deep breath, and pulled myself together.

  “Oh my God,” I whispered as I pulled random movies from the box.

  Most had Steele on the cover. If he wasn’t on the cover, he was in a sexy position with a girl on the back. My curiosity had got the best of me, and I selected the movie, Front to Back. The cover was modest compared to the others I’d looked at.

  It took me about five minutes to figure out how to turn on the TV and work the DVD player in the bedroom. I hit play and sat on the edge of the bed with my eyes glued to the screen. Nothing was catching my eye, so I fast-forwarded until I hit the first scene. Steele’s head was between a gorgeous woman’s legs, and I sat there and watched as he licked her from front to back, silent tears began spilling down my cheeks.

  Memories of him doing that to me just a few days ago flashed in my mind, causing a sob to break through. I watched until he was done, and then I saw her suck him, something I hadn’t even done yet. Finally, he slipped himself inside her, and then I shut it off. Mechanically, I put the movie back in its right spot and placed the bin in its exact same place on the shelf.

  I washed away the evidence of tears from my face and laid on the bed with my racing thoughts, it hit me that I would be on one of those explicit covers soon.

  Steele

  “Flip over, honey.”

  Farah Mae, the girl with brown hair and green eyes, did as I asked. I spit in my hand, stroked my deflating cock until it was hard again, and then sank back into her. I had never worked with her before, but she listened pretty well, and she was up for basically anything. She’d told me that she’d been in the adult-film industry for two years. The way I looked at it, she was still getting her feet wet.

  I watched her ass jiggle while I pounded into her from behind. Her pussy tightened around my cock as she screamed my name. That was the third time she’d come since starting the scene thirty-five minutes ago. The fuckin’ problem was that it wasn’t the right pussy gripping my cock, and it wasn’t the right sweet voice screaming my name.

  Ren, the camera operator, zoomed in on my dick slipping in and out of Farah. I took this moment to close my eyes. I saw Kayden’s sweet smile and her fuckin’ amazing chocolate brown eyes gazing at me. I imagined my hands gripping her hips while I slammed into her, and I could hear her voice yelling my name.

  It still wasn’t working for me though.

  Fuck.

  My rocking hips stilled. “Cut!” I yelled and pulled out. I ran a hand down my damp face.

  With a heavy voice, I asked the director, “Vic, do you have enough shots?”

  Vic brought his concerned eyes to me. “Give me a minute. I’ll see if we can make do with what we have.”

  I’d worked with Vic and Topping Productions a million times, and I’d never asked before if he had enough material. I couldn’t get Kayden the fuck out of
my head to focus. I’d compared every part of Farah’s body to Kayden’s, and Kayden’s body always won. I had thought jumping back into work would straighten out my fuckin’ head. All it had done was make it worse. Not only couldn’t I get her out of my mind long enough to work, but now, I also felt goddamn guilty in the process.

  What the fuck?

  What the hell am I supposed to do now? Stop fuckin’ making adult films and go get a nine-to-five job in some stuffy office? Come home, eat dinner, shower, watch TV, fuck Kayden, go to sleep, and then start all over the next day? Mow the lawn on the weekends and get together for damn potluck dinners with other couples?

  Oh fuckin’ hell no.

  “You’re good,” Vic said, breaking through my horrifying thoughts.

  “Great.”

  Vic said lowly, “If you want to talk, I’m a good listener.”

  I didn’t look Vic in the eye. I just mumbled, “Nah, I’m good. Must be fuckin’ jet lag.”

  Vic grumbled, “Mmhmm,” while walking away.

  I went over to the chair where Farah was sitting. “Ready?”

  She nodded her head, licked her lips, and descended to her knees.

  It was the longest time I’d ever had to jerk myself off for the big money-shot scene.

  I opened the bedroom door and found Kayden fast asleep on the bed. She was curled on her side, her body hugging a pillow bunched around her waist. Her innocent sleeping form astounded me. She was just so fuckin’ beautiful that it hurt. The guilt came back tenfold. After we’d completed the scene, I’d never scrubbed my body so fuckin’ hard in my life. If I could have dipped myself in damn bleach, I would have, but that wouldn’t have washed away the guilt of what I had done today. Nothing would.

  I closed the door quietly behind me. I placed my bag on the floor and climbed in behind her. Her whimpers put a smile on my face as she nuzzled back into me. I removed the pillow from where she held it snugly against her warm body and replaced it with my arm.

  “Hey,” she said in a sexy, husky voice.

  I took a deep inhale, filling my senses with nothing but her. “Hey,” I whispered.

  As I snaked my other arm under her, she wiggled her ass against my groin, causing me to groan. My cock automatically noticed whose ass it was, and it began a sensitive pulsation. I ground my hips against her.

  “Mmm…” Kayden moaned.

  I kissed my way from the back of her neck to her ear where I said, “I missed you, beautiful.”

  “I missed you, too.” She sighed and stretched her arms over her head.

  I took advantage of her position by catching her wrists in my hand. She rotated to look at me.

  “Do you mind?” Kayden asked, raising her brows and trying to tug her wrists free.

  “Nope.”

  My eyes stared at her pink plump lips as they formed a mischievous grin. The plan was to kiss her lips softly, but once I touched them, I couldn’t stop. I kissed her as deeply as I could. I couldn’t get my tongue far enough into her mouth. The taste of her was what I’d been craving all day. My tongue roamed and searched the depths of her. Pouring myself into the kiss, I silently apologized for what I had done. I let her hands go and broke the kiss long enough to quickly remove her top.

  Looking down at her bare chest, I muttered, “Perfect.”

  Her eyes held mine as I leaned down, and took a rosy pink nipple into my mouth. She wriggled and moaned when I bit down and sucked hard. I kissed and nibbled my way down her body, savoring the taste of her skin on my tongue. Once I reached the waistband of her shorts, I ran my tongue along the edge. Lifting her ass with my hands, I slowly pulled her shorts down her legs. The moans and whimpers coming from her sweet voice were pulling me under. I gazed into her half-lidded brown eyes and winked before my mouth captured the only pussy I ever yearned for. Fitting my open mouth over her wet heat, I sucked in.

  “Ah…” Kayden whimpered.

  I ran my tongue from her pussy to her luscious ass, causing her hips to jerk up. Cupping her raised ass, I pushed my tongue deep into her, still not getting enough of her flavor in my mouth. If I saturated myself in the depths of her sweetness, maybe the guilt would fade away. I ate her like a crazed man. Her squirming, groaning, and heavy breathing were driving me insane. After sucking hard and then biting at her clit, I sank my tongue back into her.

  “Steele!” Kayden screamed as her orgasm released.

  I licked her clean, filling myself with everything she gave me. Still, I didn’t stop. I couldn’t. Something snapped inside me. I wanted more. I needed more. I devoured her like a wild man. Her body wriggled up the bed, and I followed her, never detaching my mouth from her. I gripped her hips, pulling her flush against my mouth. She began to scream my name in protest, but I didn’t give. I just clutched her hips hard, holding her in place, as the top part of her body thrashed. Driving my rigid tongue as far into her sweet pussy as I could, she screamed my name.

  “Steele!” Her voice echoed through the room as she came.

  Her hands gripped my hair, pulling to the point of pain, as her juices flowed down the crack of her ass. Lapping and drinking her, I still didn’t want to stop.

  “Please…” Kayden croaked out, pleading.

  Heavily breathing, I took a deep inhale. Bringing myself back, I heard her hoarse voice whisper, “Steele.”

  My heart clenched at the shaky uncertainty in her voice.

  What was I doing? I just ate her like it was going to be the last fuckin’ time. God, this woman.

  I gradually laid small kisses up her lax body, trying to cool my frazzled nerves as I had probably just freaked her the fuck out. I felt a connection to this woman. It was on another level that scared the shit out of me while giving me a warm sensation that ran down my cold spine.

  As I hovered over her, she gazed at me with weary, apprehensive eyes. My insides battled with protectiveness and possessiveness, but my greed won.

  “Hold on, baby. I’m gonna fuck you hard.”

  That was exactly what I did. I rammed into her with all my strength. Nothing but grunts, groans, and moans filled my bedroom. I should have slowed down at some point, but I couldn’t. I was so consumed in marking her and her marking me that I never took in her screaming. Her soaking wet heat gripped my cock, and I came hard, harder than I’d ever thought possible. My vision hazed out along the edges. My body collapsed on top of her, and she took my weight. Her trembling fingers ran up and down my spine.

  Fuck.

  “I’m gonna shower.” I kissed behind her ear before pulling out of her.

  She whispered timidly, “Okay.”

  I knew she’d felt the difference in my actions, but between the guilt and hard sex we’d just had, I couldn’t stay and cuddle and pretend everything was okay. I crossed the threshold into the bathroom.

  “Steele?” Kayden called out, nervously.

  I turned, putting a hand up. “Not now, baby.” I ran my eyes over her gorgeous naked body, wondering if that was the last time I would ever see it again. I shut the door, took a deep breath, and rested my forehead against the cold white wood where I whispered, “I’m sorry.”

  Kayden

  I put the final additions on my makeup. Never one to do all-out dress makeup, I tried my best.

  When Cora, Addie and myself first arrived at the mall, I had scanned women’s faces. What I had seen was daytime makeup, I could only imagine how heavy the nighttime application was supposed to be.

  I had gone with soft brown and pink smoky eyes, thin eyeliner, heavy mascara, rosy cheeks, and a pale pink shimmery lip gloss. To me, I looked glamorous. To others, I was sure I looked average. My brown hair was swept up on the sides and front, held together by a simple silver clip, with curls falling down my back. My eyes roamed my face and hair as I put my earrings on, and I shrugged.

  “Good enough for me,” I muttered to my reflection.

  Before I had fallen asleep earlier, I’d vowed to myself that I was going to let loose and have fun tonight. I’d
adapt myself to my surroundings the best I could. Even though, I hadn’t come to an understanding with this lifestyle, I would give it my all. I would show Steele I could be the woman on his arm that he wanted. I’d go to this wrap party, have fun, put it in my memory log as something crazy I’d done, and move on. Aunt Sally always said I needed to live a little, and I was getting that chance handed to me.

  When in Rome…

  The only problem with my vow was what had happened when Steele got home. I’d never seen that side of Steele, not even when we had done our scene. The intensity in his body and the deprivation in his eyes had scared me. It wasn’t a bad scary feeling that would have made me scream rape. But it was a sad scary, as if he desperately needed me. I’d tried to talk to him after, but he disregarded me with his hand, and a few short words. I’d let a few tears fall onto the black pillow while he showered, and then I chastised myself. I was the one who had put me in this situation. I had flown across the United States with a man I barely knew.

  I had no one to blame but myself.

  I twisted and turned, checking myself out in the floor-length mirror sitting near the vanity. I grinned, took a deep breath, and opened the bathroom door. I watched as Steele rose from the bed, and we gazed at each other.

  I gradually took in the gorgeousness of Steele as he stood firm to his standing. His hair was ruffled perfectly with styling product in it, making him look yummier than ever. His beard was freshly trimmed, leaving a thick stubble of hair. A midnight blue button-down shirt molded his upper body with perfection, and making his blue eyes pop. The top three buttons were undone, showing his tanned skin. He had on tailored black slacks and black loafers with a small silver buckle high across the top of the shoe. Even his simple black belt with a heavy silver buckle was sexy.

  As my eyes started their climb, they landed on his drinking me in. When his eyes came to mine, his lips formed that sexy grin. My knees wobbled, and my stomach flipped.

  I saw his lips moving, but I didn’t hear anything. They moved again, and so did he, stopping an inch away from me. I shook the sexy-Steele haze from my head.