Beneath Your Beauty Read online

  Steele had told me that I needed to, “Calm the fuck down.”

  Those had been the wrong choice of words. He should have known to never tell a ranting woman to calm the fuck down. Therefore, I had flipped him off and retreated to my bedroom for the rest of the day. It had been a very long day, but I’d spent it reading in my new chair.

  I’d wanted to Google him a few times, but I’d believed that perhaps this wasn’t the best time. It’d probably be best to do that with a clear head, if I could ever manage to get one.

  Every couple of hours, Steele had timidly knocked on the door. He’d enter, put a tray of food on the bed, and walk out. The third time this had taken place, I’d almost caved when he cautiously smiled and winked at me before walking out, but I’d held my ground.

  Maybe Jeff was right. Maybe I am PMSing.

  Not only was this relationship stuff new to Steele, it was new to me as well. Every minute I spent with him, I would find myself weakening. I needed to be strong and keep my distance from the dominant pull he had on me even if it caused reactions to my body I had never experienced and feelings I happened to really enjoy. Still, it was so damn hard, and there was something about the way he would look at me.

  I thumped the trays onto the cherry-stained wooden bar, triggering Shirley to turn my way.

  “Who pissed in your cornflakes this morning?” Shirley asked in her Southern accent.

  Shirley was the manager at Hunter’s bar, Murrays. She was a heavyset woman with skin the color of smooth milk chocolate, and nobody knew her age.

  Hunter had told me that she’d filled in that question on her application as, None of your damn business.

  However, my guess was that she was in her fifties. She always dressed in flowery dresses that flowed with a matching color wrap placed on her head. Shirley might be a hard woman, but she had a heart as big as Texas.

  Every Sunday morning, when I dropped off the trays of cookies, we would sit and have coffee. She was the only person I could comfortably talk to. She wouldn’t judge or look down at me. She gave me the motherly advice everyone sought at some point in their lives.

  With a huff, I responded, “Don’t get me started.”

  Shirley placed a steamy cup of coffee on the counter in front of me. “Consider yourself started, honey.” She then opened one of the plastic-wrapped trays and popped a shortbread ball into her mouth. “Spill it,” she said around a mouthful.

  “You might need a shot of Bailey’s in that coffee of yours if you want me to spill it,” I warned her.

  “Already ahead of you.” She lifted her cup in the air before taking a swallow.

  I took a long breath and let her have it. “Well, Mary owed a drug dealer some money, and the prick has been looking for her for eight fucking years. In his search, he found me.” I paused to take a sip of my coffee.

  Shirley popped another ball into her mouth.

  “He held me responsible and said I needed to pay him ten thousand to clear her debt.”

  “Goddamn dealers,” Shirley muttered.

  I nodded my head as if Shirley and I’d had experience with drug dealers on a daily basis. Then again, with Shirley, anything was possible.

  I continued, “So, I hocked as much stuff as I could part with, and I had a difference of four thousand to make up for. I looked through the ads in the newspaper to see if there was any way I could make some fast cash.”

  Shirley cut in, “Baby girl, why didn’t you come to me?”

  I shrugged while looking down at my coffee. Too humiliated to look Shirley in the eye, I focused on my cup. “I saw an ad that said I could get paid up to five thousand for one scene in an adult movie.”

  Shirley choked on her coffee. I quickly leaned up on the foot rail of the bar and started patting her back. Once she got her coughing under control, she held up her hand. She turned and grabbed the bottle of Bailey’s. After opening it, she took a swig before pouring a hefty amount into her cup. Before placing the bottle down, she put a splash into mine.

  I grinned at her. “Thanks.”

  Shirley took a deep breath and waved a hand for me to continue.

  I confessed, “I did it.”

  She looked up. “Oh, sweet Jesus.” She began praying to the heavens.

  “I got four thousand for it.”

  Shirley’s head jerked down and focused back on me. “Damn.”

  I nodded, agreeing with her. “So, with my total of ten grand, I went to the dealer the next morning. I thought it was going to be easy, but it wasn’t. The guy that I had done the scene with, Steele Waters, was there. There was all this confusion, and shit, now, we owe Marco, the drug dealer, a hundred grand all because we pissed him off.”

  Shirley started fanning herself.

  “It gets better,” I informed her.

  She slapped a hand on the bar. “Oh God, girl, don’t tell me you’re pregnant.”

  “No,” I whined while shaking my head.

  “TSD then?” she asked.

  “No,” I drawled. “And it’s STD, Shirley, not TSD.”

  “STD, TSD—it’s all the same with the coochie crawlers, saber tooth crotch crickets—”

  I screeched with a smile, “Shirley.”

  She signaled her hand around. “Sorry, honey. Bailey’s is kicking in. Go on.”

  I took a sip of my lukewarm coffee and cleared my throat. “He’s been staying with me since Friday.” I lowered my voice before telling her, “We’re dating, too.”

  “What?” Shirley shouted.

  “What in the hell are you yelling about, woman?” Hunter’s voice bounced off the bar walls.

  Shirley and I swiftly turned toward the back of the bar. I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me, but unfortunately, they weren’t. Steele emerged from the hallway where Hunter had just crossed the threshold.

  “Sweet baby Jesus, come to mama, big boy,” Shirley cooed while running her deep amber eyes up and down Steele.

  I placed my elbows on the bar and sheltered the sides of my face with my hands. “That’s him,” I quietly told a yearning Shirley.

  Awestruck by Steele, she mumbled, “Dear God, I didn’t think they made men that perfect anymore.”

  I turned to see Steele sauntering over with an airing confidence that filled the room. Just as hypnotized by his beauty, I agreed, “Me either.”

  Steele

  My heart skipped a few beats with the way Kayden’s eyes were fixated on me as I walked directly to her. Dressed in a loose purple spaghetti-strap tank top, short jean shorts, and white flip-flops, she looked adorable. I could eat her right up.

  Fuck.

  It killed me that she wouldn’t talk to me and that she’d hidden out in her room. I knew I shouldn’t have said some of the things I had. And I’d learned the hard fuckin’ way never to tell a woman to calm the fuck down. I had done everything possible that I could think of to show her how sorry I was. I’d brought her meals and had her coffee ready and waiting on the back porch this morning.

  When I’d called my friend, Patty, and told her what had been going on, she’d told me that I fucked up royally. Then, she’d guided me through what I should do. Her advice was to let Kayden cool down, and she would come to me.

  Patty had been more shocked that I’d said I found someone and I was dating her. There had been such a long pause on the phone that I’d thought I lost connection.

  Of course, she’d rubbed it in by telling me, “I told you so.”

  Then, in her bubbly voice, she’d said she couldn’t wait to tell everyone. I’d told her that she needed to keep her mouth shut because I hadn’t even told my dickhead agent yet. In addition, I had to be cautious. I knew the adult industry media was going to have a fuckin’ field day with this news.

  Now, with the problem that had arisen this morning, I was going to have to deal with Kayden and my life mixing together a lot sooner than I’d anticipated.

  I came up behind Kayden and positioned my hands on her hips. I smiled at the leering w
oman behind the bar. Kayden turned her head, snubbing me.

  I placed a kiss on her bare shoulder. “We need to talk,” I said in her ear.

  Kayden replied quietly and firmly, “Did you forget that I’m not talking to you?”

  The ogling woman interjected, “I’m Shirley, sweet thang.” She shuffled herself around the bar, coming straight for me, as she held her arms out wide. “Give mama some sugar.”

  My six-two frame awkwardly embraced all of about five-foot Shirley in a hug.

  She swayed me back and forth in her arms. “Sweet Lord, you smell good, too,” she whispered.

  Once I freed myself from Shirley’s hold, I stated, “Steele Kincaid, Kayden’s boyfriend.”

  Kayden swung around. “Kincaid?” she questioned curiously.

  I twisted to face her and winked. “My real last name, Summer.”

  She rolled her eyes.

  “I need to speak to Kayden,” I announced.

  Before she had a chance to interrupt, I snatched her hand. I pulled her through the bar, down the hall, and out the back door. Her feet had to go double-time to match my hasty steps.

  “What’s going on?” Kayden asked determinedly.

  I positioned her back up against Hunter’s truck, pinning her in with my arms on either side of her. “We have to take a trip to California. We’re leaving tonight.”

  Kayden blinked. “Excuse me?”

  “I have a wrap-slash-promotions party I have to attend for a film I did.”

  She vigorously shook her head. “I am not going to California.” She poked a finger in my chest. “You, my dear, have a great time.”

  She tried to move, but I stiffened my arms.

  “You’re going,” I stated evenly.

  Kayden sighed. “Steele, I’m not going with you. I—”

  “Kayden,” I broke in to her talking, “you are going with me. The tickets have been bought, and I’m not leaving you here with Marco and his men watching your every move.” I told her again, “You’re going.”

  “I am not!” she shrieked, stomping her foot.

  Dropping my arms and bending over, I put a shoulder to her stomach and lifted her before carrying her to her car.

  She pounded on my back while demanding, “I’m not going!”

  “Have a nice trip!” Hunter yelled from the door.

  “You knew about this?” Kayden shouted back.

  Hunter chuckled. “Yep.”

  “I hate you!” she bellowed.

  “No, you don’t, and bring me something back!” Hunter teasingly yelled.

  I situated her in the passenger seat.

  “Fuck you, Hunter!” she hollered.

  Then, she flipped him off before I shut her door.

  Steele

  “I can’t breathe,” Kayden uttered while squeezing my hand. “Oh God, I’m dying.”

  Earlier in the day, I’d helped Kayden make the deliveries she would normally make on Monday mornings. Then, I’d assisted her in packing and sorting things out around the house. She had been fuckin’ adorable as she packed while being extremely pissed. Huffing and puffing her way around the bedroom, she’d tossed clothes all over the place. It had taken all my power not to throw her on the bed of rumpled clothes and fuck her attitude right out of her.

  When she’d asked me what to pack, I had told her anything she would be comfortable in, and then went on to let know her that the party was formal, and she had gone off the deep end.

  I’d kept Patty’s words clear in my head—make her happy.

  I’d done just that, telling Kayden we would go shopping and find her a new dress. This had made her fairly calm. Even though she’d shrugged her shoulders at the mention, but I had seen a small smile playing on her lips.

  Note to self: Take her shopping a lot.

  All throughout the day, she’d kept informing me that she did not like to fly. It was one of her biggest fears. I’d tried to soothe the subject by telling her not to worry because I’d be right by her side. I hadn’t realized how fuckin’ bad it was going to be until we had walked into the airport, and she’d started hyperventilating.

  “I got you, Princess,” I said, squeezing the shit out of her hand.

  “Ow! Why did you do that?”

  I grinned at her as we walked up to the ticket stand, and I tossed my license on the counter. “Two first-class tickets, Steele Kincaid, and Kayden Brewer.” I told the man behind the kiosk.

  He was eyeing Kayden. Instead of jumping over the counter and pounding his face, which was what I wanted to do, I bent and touched my lips to Kayden’s, knowing that brief contact would calm me.

  Then I spoke softly in her ear, “I squeezed your hand to focus your attention on something else besides the fact that you’re dying.” I chuckled.

  “Here you go, Mr. Kincaid.” The ogling shit placed the tickets and my information on the counter. “Can I help you with anything else?” Then, the little dick head turned and smiled at Kayden.

  “Yeah, you can stop eye-fuckin’ my girl.”

  Counter boy stumbled nervously, “Um…”

  “Steele,” Kayden gritted. She looked over at the distraught, paling dickhead behind the counter. “No, thank you. That will be all.” She picked up the papers and pulled me away.

  I eyed the fucker, watching him squirm, until I couldn’t see him anymore.

  Little cocksucker.

  “Why did you do that?” Kayden asked.

  I brought my attention to the long corridor we were walking down. “Because no one fucks with my things,” I said through clenched teeth.

  “Oh, so I’m a thing now,” she said in a snippy tone.

  We weaved our way through the mob and stopped in front of the restrooms.

  I cupped her face. “No, sweetheart, you are not a thing, but you are mine, and I don’t like people fuckin’ with what’s mine.”

  “Steele—” she said softly.

  “No, Kayden, don’t Steele me. You’re mine. I’m going to protect you and keep you close by my side until the possibility arises that I might not be able to hold you there any longer.” I touched my lips to hers. “Now, go.”

  I smiled and smacked her ass when she spun to walk towards the bathroom. She glanced at me over her shoulder and grinned. My fuckin’ heart clenched.

  Two motion-sickness pills and a shot of whiskey later, Kayden was feeling no nervousness whatsoever. Slouched in the comforts of first-class, she turned her drowsy eyes to mine. “This is nice,” she drew out.

  I laughed.

  “Don’t laugh at me,” she mumbled around her lazy smile.

  The roar of the engines filled the cabin, and her hand clutched mine. Her eyes flew to the window where she watched us pull away from the terminal.

  I leaned over the arm and whispered in her ear, “Wanna join the mile-high club?”

  “We can’t have sex on the plane!” she said, loudly.

  A few passengers within earshot glimpsed our way. I wanted to sink my cock deep inside her, but she had ruined our chances by announcing it.

  “Maybe on the flight back home,” I said quietly.

  Home…

  I was on my way home to California. I was taking Kayden to my house. So, why had the words on the flight back home tasted so good in my mouth and rolled off my tongue so smoothly?

  I watched Kayden as she looked out the window.

  Home…

  Still pictures of the last few days flashed through my mind—the timid look in her eyes when I’d first seen her, that gaze she had when I’d first sunk my cock into her, and the bitchy attitude she had thrown around in front of Forenzo’s.

  Damn, she made me so hard that morning.

  My favorite observation of her in these past few days was watching her move about the kitchen when she was baking. I had rewritten an email four times because I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her.

  Home…

  Is she where I want my home to be? Could this be it? Are these the feelings Patty told me about
? Or am I so wrapped up in Kayden’s world right now that I can’t see anything else?

  Maybe going to California, back to my world, would shake me of these feelings.

  “Talk to me?” Kayden asked, breaking me of my spiraling thoughts.

  Facing me, she rested her head back with her legs tucked up underneath her.

  “What do you want me to say, Princess?”

  She blinked her eyes slowly, and I knew she wouldn’t be awake much longer.

  “Tell me about Steele Kincaid.”

  “Not much to tell,” I said, twisting in my seat to face her.

  She asked softly, “How did you get into the adult business?”

  The plane lifted up into the air, and Kayden’s eyes grew as wide as they could. I knew I had to say something to take her mind off the flight, but I wasn’t ready to tell her my story. From the outside, it looked all fuckin’ peaches and cream. But how I’d gotten here was far from that.

  “I was in the right place at the right time.”

  “Oh, come on,” Kayden pushed.

  With the look in her eyes, she would only last minutes before she passed out, so I decided I could skim my way through it.

  “My mom died from cancer when I was nine,” I started.

  “I’m so sorry. That must have been painful, losing her when you were so young,” Kayden said remorsefully as she stroked my arm with her available hand.

  I took a deep breath. “Yeah, it sucked.”

  “What about your dad?”

  I looked to the front of the plane, watching the flight attendants ramble about safety. “He’s dead to me.”

  “Oh…”

  Facing Kayden, and after seeing the surprised look on her face, I gave her more. “The day after I turned eighteen, he told me he had done his job, and then he fuckin’ took off.”

  “I’m so sorry. Have you spoken to him since?”

  “No.”

  Right at that moment, the flight attendant came around and took drink orders, relieving me of having to go any further.

  After we received our drinks, Kayden took a few sips of her ginger ale, and then she passed out. I watched her sleep, just as I had the other night. Her lips were slightly parted, and she had a peaceful look on her face. All the same feelings came back to me.